Happiness

I’m unsure what created this shift in my emotional state - I'm getting closer to finding my spark. Which I am grateful for, sometimes it can be difficult to maintain a positive mindset and to find motivation. So embrace and celebrate those small victories. 

Even without pain - maintaining a healthy mental state can be a constant battle for many of us. Lately, I’ve noticed what triggers these emotional responses. I have become increasingly aware of the fact that life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you choose to respond to it.

In reference to my previous entry, life can hand us manure - it's our choice whether or not to turn it into fertiliser. 

Our external world, what people say to us, what they think about us, what happens to us - all of this is outside of ourselves and we cannot control that. If we allow our external reality to dictate our feelings or our self-worth then we become trapped and our state of happiness is often in flux. 

I am aware of the irony that the more I study the science of happiness the more elusive it becomes. Happiness is subjective, the more I try to understand it the less I understand it.  In the words of Socrates "A wise man knows that he knows nothing". 

The more we fixate on our ideal of happiness, what it should feel and look like the more unhappiness we create. 

This week especially happiness or the lack of it has been at the forefront of my mind and I think a vital component to that is accepting that which we cannot control, just like I cannot control that one day I might not have the strength to get out of bed unaided as my pain becomes increasingly unpredictable. These things happen to us in life, we frustrate ourselves for not yet reaching our ‘idealised self’, if we are off-kilter on our lifetime line, etc.  Life has detours and setbacks, when we become entrenched by our own ideals and expectations we create these rules and bottom lines for ourselves. 

Such as: ‘I must have a child before I am 30’ or ‘I must get promoted by next year’ or ‘I must begin my studies and go back to school’ we can do these things but they should not feel like 'musts'. 

The more I reflect on happiness the more aware I am that it requires: acceptance [not only towards others but towards oneself], gratitude, selfless acts [charity and acts of compassion], purpose & presence.  

It reminds me of my favourite passage from 'The Alchemist - by Paulo Cohelo' 

"The secret of happiness is to see all the marvels of the world, and never forget the drops of oil in the spoon."

When we desperately search for something, we may attract the latter - as we are only focusing on that which we lack. An energy of lack will attract lack. So we must shift our energy to be one of abundance to attract abundance. 

Life winds will shift and throw us off course but we can adjust our sails. We can harness our strength and inner resources to weather these storms.

All we have is now. 

Know that compassion is like a droplet in a lake, once that droplet hits the water's surface there is a ripple effect. One good deed births another - this is the true power of community, 

Fellow alien, you possess a gift that no one else has – you’re unique you have your own talents, your own fingerprint [there is no other like it]. Your roots are strong because you have grown in harsh winds - get out there and show the world your spark. 

- Han